Born Down in a Dead Man's Town

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Today is Bruce Springsteen's 65th birthday, so it only seems appropriate to reflect (again) on what his music means to me and how it has influenced my life. As far a musical tastes go, mine are not particularly hip or eclectic. I enjoy classic rock, a bit of folk, and some show tunes for good measure. I know what I like and I like it entirely un-ironically. Inasmuch, I abuse the ability to hit repeat and will happily listen to the same song on loop for hours. 

Not only is the Boss my favorite musician of all time, he is also my go-to listen for nearly every situation, nearly every feeling. His repertoire is a musical medicine cabinet of sorts; healer of all that ails you. I've written before about how nearly every major milestone in my twenties has been marked by a Springsteen song or album. To this day, I am immediately taken back to memories of summers of newly-discovered independence, my college graduation, or my wedding day with the opening riffs of the Greetings from Asbury Park and Born to Run albums. I often rank seeing the Boss play Wrigley Field as the best day of my life. However, while I will always love and appreciate Bruce for the big moments, it's his music filling the quiet between the milestones that I will always treasure. 

After my leap into unemployment (and uncertainty) last year, I turned to the Born in the U.S.A album for comfort. Although it had never been one of my favorites, over the course of those insecure few months it filled me with feelings of rejuvenation and optimism. Born in the U.S.A tells a story of getting knocked down and picking yourself back up again, because that's the only option. In many ways, it's also a love story. But its pervasive story is that of a hopeful new beginning. When I felt like I had "nowhere to run, nowhere to go," once again the music of the Boss carried me home. 

It's that promise of hope that brings me back to his music again and again. When I need a song that's guaranteed to put a smile on my face, I turn to "Rosalita (Come Out Tonight)". When I'm feeling lost, I turn to "Hungry Heart." When I'm hurting, I turn to "City of Ruins." In a musical homage to The Band's "The Weight" (my extreme love for that song deserves a post of its own), "City of Ruins" weaves a story of loss with the ever-hopeful chorus giving a glimpse of the beauty that will rise from the ashes. "Come on, rise up..."

In these moments of joy and happiness, pain and sorrow, I find myself automatically reaching for this music. By way of his words, his music, and his voice, the Boss has been there in every moment to celebrate and to mourn, to encourage or to just give a reason to turn up the radio and sing along. There's rarely an occasion that a little Bruce won't make better.

And so on this day, along with my birthday wishes, I want to also say thank you to the Boss. For writing what has become the soundtrack of my twenties. For being an enduring symbol of the strength of the underdog. For being a constant reminder that hope is everywhere, and for teaching us where to look. 

She found out how to cope

She rides to heaven on a gyroscope

The Daily News asked her for the dope

She said, "Man, the dope's that there's still hope.

Current Favorites

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1) Parks and Rec. 

Per the suggestions of a few friends, I started watching this on Netflix. Although I'd seen a bit of the first season in the past, I admit that I wasn't terribly impressed. I'm not a huge fan of single-camera, mockumentary-style sitcoms. However, now that I'm further into the series, I'm hooked. (But only on Season 3, so no spoilers!) The writing is hilarious, the characters are delightful, and I just can't get enough of Leslie Knope. I love her ambitious attitude and passion for her community. I could use a bit of the Knope spirit in my life. 

2) Jasper Fforde's Thursday Next series. 

This book series has literally been on my "To Read" list since high school, but for some reason I never got around to it. Over the summer, my friend Joe raved about it which gave me the final push I needed to dive in. I'm currently in the middle of the third book, absolutely loving it, and forcing myself to read slowly so that I can savor them. This series is a perfect blend of science fiction and satire, and Thursday Next is the perfect literary heroine. It's unlike anything I've ever read. 

3) "People Help the People," covered Birdy.

Although this album is a few years old, I've just recently started listening to it consistently. This song has been on repeat recently. I'm not sure what it is about it, but I can't get enough. Her covers of "Skinny Love" and "Fire and Rain" are also worth a listen. 

4) This awesome infographic about library usage. 

Despite what some might think, libraries are alive and well! Millennials continue to utilize libraries and are even out-reading older generations. My favorite statistic? In the U.S., there are more public libraries than there are McDonald's. Long live the libraries! 

5) The John Muir Trail. 

I love me a good documentary. I really love me a good documentary about mountains. So, when I saw Mile, Mile and a Half on Netflix, I knew that I would be in for a treat. This is a documentary about a group of artists who thru-hiked the John Muir Trail in California and documented their journey. Lately, I've been obsessed with the idea of long-distance hiking, thanks to books like Wild (PCT), A Walk in the Woods (AT), and Almost Somewhere (JMT). It's not something I have any experience with, but has this Midwesterner longing for mountains to climb. Perhaps one day...

I'm Still Here, Redux

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Although the calendar still indicates a few more precious days of summer, here in the Mitten all signs point toward fall. The skies today were gray, the air cool, and the sidewalks soaked with rain. While I generally prefer a bit more of a transition into this time of year, I am welcoming it with open arms (and umbrellas).

This summer flew by in a blink and was heavy with classes, a play, and the weddings of lovely friends. I didn't spend as much time up north, at Lake Michigan, or eating frozen yogurt as I would have liked, but it was a beautiful summer nonetheless. I made a lot of lattes, wrote a lot about libraries and reference services, and thought a lot about what I'd like life after grad school to look like. (Preferably a view of mountains from behind a reference desk.)

After a ridiculously busy month of July which included finishing classes for the semester, starring in a play, and spending a week in the Canadian wilderness, I had the entire month of August off of school. Although I relished in the lack of homework, I also experienced a lack of purpose. Despite the intensity and often overwhelming workload, I really love my program. I missed school. (A sentence I never thought I'd utter.) If nothing else, I've learned over these past nine months that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Libraries and literacy are my passion, and my heart swells at the thought of spending the rest of my life sharing that passion with others. 

With the transition to fall comes orchestra rehearsals, ArtPrize, Shakespeare Festival, Rocky Horror, birthdays, anniversaries. In just over a month, Kyle and I will celebrate 7 years together, as well as turning another year older. This past year has brought many changes and challenges, gray hairs and tears, and memories that make my heart feel full.

So, I continuously remind myself that I am exactly where I am supposed to be at this very moment. I repeat my grad school mantra: Don't panic. Kick ass. I draw strength from the supportive people who surround me. But more than anything, I hold on to hope. Because sometimes, that's all there is. 

As always, thank you for reading friends. Thank you for having my back. And thank you for not just giving me hope for today, but hope for tomorrow as well. 

I'm Still Here

My life, for the past 6 months.

Hello, friends.

I'm sorry this little space has been so quiet lately. Life has swept me away, with tides both rough and smooth, sometimes both all at once. I have one semester of grad school under my belt and am currently submerged in another. As I write this, I'm in the midst of finals week for one class, and midterm week for the other. Rehearsals for a new (thankfully comedic) play that I'm in began this week as well, something I'm really excited about. 

The waves are occasionally choppy, but I'm staying afloat. It's not always easy, but it is so, so worth it. 

I promise to return soon with a proper update, but in the meantime know that I love you, I miss you, and that you're never far from my mind. I hope you're all enjoying these summer months and are soaking up all of the sunshine in your lives.

Thanks for sticking around, friends. 

March Favorites

Fingers crossed that I can count sunshine and above-freezing temperatures among next month's favorites! Oh, Pure Michigan. 

1) 8tracks.

Thanks to my friend Victoria who introduced me to this music playlist app, I'm discovering new (to me, obviously) music that I'm absolutely LOVING. Current favorites include Ed Sheeran, Passenger, and Birdy's cover of Bon Iver's "Skinny Love." Having playlists of new music makes running and doing homework a little more bearable. If you do the 8tracks thing, you can follow me @justgrandmolly. 

2) Live tweeting the Oscars and Ellen's selfie.

I haven't enjoyed the Oscars this much in years, despite the fact that I hadn't seen many of the nominated films. Ellen was a delight, and I don't care if it was just a crummy commercial, that epic selfie was the best. And that pizza looked delicious. 

3) "Let It Go" with classroom instruments.

For some reason I'd decided that I wasn't going to listen to "Let It Go" or its plethora of covers until I could hear my BFF Idina sing it at the Oscars. (I loved it.) But as far as I'm concerned, this song is a Classroom Instruments original. Jimmy Fallon and The Roots, if you're reading this, DO MORE CLASSROOM INSTRUMENTS. 

4) Lily Tomlin!

I went into this hoping to laugh until I cried, and I was not disappointed. Lily Tomlin was FANTASTIC. She performed for 2 hours straight, with no intermission. It was insane. Edith Ann and Ernestine made an appearance, as did other characters from her LaughIn days. Also, when she laughed she sounded like Ms. Frizzle, and that was just the best thing. 

5) Samuel Smith's Organic Chocolate Stout.

I've found my new favorite beer. That is all. 

Life Lessons from Jurassic Park

It's no secret around here that I'm a huge fan of Jurassic Park. For so many reasons. 

But mostly this one.
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But I'm not here to talk about how much I love to hate Dennis Nedry or Dr. Malcom's sex appeal or how much that scene in the kitchen still scares the shit out of me. (Although I could talk about all of those things. A LOT.) I want to talk about how Jurassic Park reminds me to persevere in the face of adversity. (And not just the dinosaur kind.)

Allow me to set the scene: 

Shortly after the T-Rex eats the lawyer off the toilet and then proceeds to make a mess of pretty much everything, Dr. Grant rescues Timmy from the Jeep that was flung into the tree by the T-Rex. They quickly climb down only to find themselves trapped in the Jeep again after it plummets on top of them. 

Because of course it does.

It's fiiiiine.
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After the dust has settled, the two have this little exchange.

Timmy: "We're back in the car again."

Dr. Grant: "But at least we're out of the tree."

So often I feel like I'm back in the car again. To put it simply, this winter has been difficult. Adjusting to balancing grad school classes with work and rehearsals and life in general have left me struggling to maintain my composure. The depression and anxiety that I worked so hard to overcome this summer came creeping in, and I felt like a failure in all aspects of my life. I was angry and frustrated with myself for failing, for losing control. I was back in the car. Again.

But in the midst of this trying season, there have been moments of clarity, of purpose, of resolve. Though entirely overwhelmed, it is all with things I love. I love my program, my job, my community, my friends, my family. I'm no longer stuck in a dead end career, without passion or purpose. I know my place, where I belong. It's difficult, it's a mess, it's hard work, but this life is beautiful, and it finds a way.  

At least I'm out of the tree. 

Live fiercely, friends.

(Belated) February Favorites

Abbreviated favorites for an abbreviated month. Here's to spring!

1) Of Monsters and Men.

I was first introduced to this band through The Secret Life of Walter Mitty soundtrack and quickly became obsessed. It's difficult to narrow down a favorite song, but these lyrics from "Mountain Sound" really speak to me:

I heard them calling in the distance

So I packed my things and ran

Far away from all the trouble 

I had caused with my two hands

2) Jimmy Fallon and The Muppets sing "The Weight."

This might possibly be the best thing that has ever happened in the history of  everything ever. Or at the very least, in Muppet/Fallon collaborations. This song is so meaningful to me, and to see my favorite Muppet friends sing it moves me nearly to tears. What can I say? The Muppets make me feel feelings.

3) These guys.

Vic, Morgan, & Mo
//Feb2014

With a little wine and a lot of love, these beautiful women always carry me through, even on the grayest of days.